Did you ever ask yourself, "What would it be like to be married to me?"
Now before you get too grandiose in your explanation of your finer points, what would it be like to put up with YOUR little quirks?
My husband and I have spent the past 2-3 years in our empty nest confined a bit more because of health issues and we have had a chance to see each other "up close and personal" in a deeper way than ever before. Some of our quirks have become more apparent. LOL
Isn't it all about "for richer for poorer" "for better or worse" "in sickness and in health"? As we counsel pre-marrieds, Terry and I talk to these starry eyed young folks about the need for the "long-term view" in marriage -- the importance in reaffirming the permanency of the relationship and for dialoging about the years to come and picturing growing older (and OLD) together.
But what about when it happens? We've found that communication and prayer are our best tools for building understanding of the changes occuring during this transition time. Because we have both maintained our busy schedules during these times of compromised energy -- we often find ourselves too tired to talk much. We cover the basics of our day, collapse on our double recliner, grab our laptops and start to collect and connect the pieces of our day to each other.
Whoever said "getting old isn't for wimps" knew what he was talking about! I've learned volumes about chronic pain from watching my husband endure the searing pain of a rheumatoid condition. He's taught me a lot about balancing energy and pain management and ways to rise above the pain by keeping mentally active, writing and teaching.
I've often thought how nice it is to be married to someone who is my age because we share about the same level of activities. (Though my husband says I drive him crazy trying to keep up with my activities and then attempting to follow the thread of my often disjointed conversation, afterwards).
We have 36 1/2 years of memories and shared history that cements our relationship plus a wealth of experiences which we have endured together that have refined, "toughened" and forged our oneness.
Maybe he'd best speak as to what it's like to be married to me . . .
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My parents come to mind. They've had some rough patches in their marriage around a decade back but now they're doing great, albeit residing in a now empty nest. My mom says my dad is a pain to take care of, he keeps on forgetting to take his diabetes medication. When I look at them, it occurs to me that it is quite scary but at the same time a lovely sight to see a loving couple growing old together. Marriage workshops really helps.
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